5 things I learned living in rural Malawi

The first 6 months of 2020 I lived in a rural village in Malawi, one of the most beautiful, but also poorest countries in the world. It was an amazing experience, getting to know the country and it's people. I can now fully understand why Malawi is called "the warm heart of Africa". I would like to share my insights of my time there with you. Undermentioned lessons actually weren't "new" for me, but my time in Malawi definitely served as a reminder.

First of all, we are all living in different worlds. 

Just to be clear, I am not saying one world is better than the other. I am just saying that we, on this earth, are living completely different lives in completely different worldviews. This sounds so obvious, but when do you really grasp it? I personally only grasped it 6 months ago in rural Malawi, when I was living my normal life next to wonderful people with a completely different perspective. Normally you are surrounded by people living the same and going through a similar life path, so this was an eye-opener. Although I don't want to judge our differences, it does feel a little uncomfortable when I started comparing.  

While we are stressing about not enough likes on social media, my 25 year old Malawian friend never even heard about "Instagram". While we are stressing about balancing work and our private life, my neighbor has his family and friends around all the time. While we are worrying about not going on a vacation this year, at the same time, my current neighbors here in rural Malawi haven't left their village in years (maybe ever?). And unlike us, they aren't even worrying at all. For what I was observing, they just took life as it came. Their down to earth attitude, joy and happiness with the status quo is something I will take with me forever.  

So what I'm trying to say is that my experience there was a bit contradictory with what I used to believe six months ago. Because of our travelling options, international careers, connections through social media, and so on, I would have told you that the world was becoming "one big village". For us it is, yes. But for most people on this planet, it isn't. Their world is the village they were born in and are still living in. And that is neither better or worse. It's just different.

Second, development cooperation is delicate and complex. 

Like I said, I admired the spirit of my neighbours. It still is true though, that when I asked if they needed some help or support, they said yes. They told me they are lacking food, housing-, farming- and educational materials, investments, jobs and infrastructure. When I looked at their problems from our worldview I had the feeling basic necessities weren't fulfilled. So I tried to contribute what I could. But in this "helping", from a privileged kind-of-white person to a community in rural Malawi, I had to be careful not to reinforce the superiority I already inherited from me being born in Western Europe. For example, I have read opinions claiming that development cooperation is just a modern form of colonization. I had troubles deciding if I should help, who to help and how, meanwhile trying to be as less patronizing as I could be. To be honest, it was definitely an internal struggle for me.

So I reached out to a couple of experts in development cooperation. They helped me a lot, but each individual of course had his/her own idea about it. Like I said, it is very complex. There is one advice I remember profoundly: "There is no right way to do development cooperation, because it's such a delicate thing to do. Each idea has it's positive aspects and it's negative aspects. Helping is a good thing to do, as long as you keep the needs of the ones helped as a first priority." So that's what I kept in mind the whole time I was there.

Third: Race is still relevant.

And the title is a big understatement, actually. Racism embedded in social and economic systems, not in an obvious hateful way, but in subtle but very important ways, is a global issue. The underlying belief that white people are superior to people of other races, is a global thing.  

The recent police brutality deaths, the outrage concerning institutional racism this provoked in the US, the countless studies showing structural racism in Western countries and personal experiences of POC show that in the Western world we are far from where we should be.  

I also experienced this in Malawi. For example, white males are called "boss" very often, even if there isn't a work relationship. The way some white employers treat their black employees is unacceptable. As "azungus" (that's how they call foreigners/white people) you are special and are perceived as little celebrities, asking to wave back. If you want, you can subtly cut the line if you are waiting to be served. Sometimes, you are just picked first. People were also very impressed that my black father was able to marry a white woman. The list goes on.  

Unfortunately, this is the way history teached them and teached us. In my opinion, the only way to change this is to stand for equality, educate yourself and others and speak/act up when something is not right. Although it sometimes puts me in difficult or uncomfortable situations, I will continue speaking up about it.  

My fourth insight: we are very individualistic.

I experienced the difference between an individualistic country versus a collectivistic country firsthand. When people in Malawi asked for support, it was usually so they could support their parents, siblings, other relatives or orphans. People look out for each other and share what they have, even if they have little, materialistically speaking. Their generosity and taking care of each other is something I admire and will try to follow their footsteps in.  

My fourth insight is also an extension of my third. We are not only individualistic in our pursuit of happiness or success, at the same time, we are very individualistic in the way we think about racism. Yes, a person can hate people of a certain race, and act and speak upon it. But most people are quick to condemn that kind of behaviour. Racist people learned this, and will keep their racists opinions to themselves to not face public judgement. Most people though aren't explicitly racist. But that doesn't mean there is no racism today, or that racism is fading out. Inherently racist people are not the main problem we are facing.  

Racism is individualistic in a way that every individual has (unconscious) biases, but very and more so collectivistic, in a way that these biases come from somewhere. You create them by racism embed in your environment from the moment you opened your eyes for the first time. Think about what you see on tv, what you read in the paper, what you see (and don't see) in magazines. Comments from a family member that aren't really okay but still everyone at the dining table remains quiet. Your environment was and still is based upon a white framework. How many of your favorite child tv-programs showed some etnic diversity? How many hair or make up tutorials you read in a teen magazine, were fit for curls or coloured skin? Did you have one non-white teacher? Racism is collectivistic as it is an attribute of a society and is embed within structures, institutions, even within algorithms (but that's a whole other story). 

 Last but not least: you learn a lot about yourself during a break of 6 months.

I was always pretty sceptical about coaching books pretending that "you really get to know yourself" when you go travelling, when you put your life on hold,... As a busy twenty-something-year-old I thought I knew my interests and priorities. That said, to my great surprise, I did learn a lot about myself those months. When you have time to stop and think, when you live in another culture and outside influences and norms are minimal, you do you differently and you discover a lot about your natural tendencies, interests, personality and so on. It can be a little confrontational too, but I do recommend it.

A little endnote.

All of the above are personal experiences and insights, it is not my intention to challenge or influence your own opinion about the subjects. It's just to let you know what I experienced those 6 months. All pictures are taken by me.

Ending with a quote always works ;-) so here is mine: